I figured I’d write now instead of tonight because I’m doing my mat exercises at night now so I wouldn’t have time and I’d pass out lol. Plus I have 4 dogs to tend too and my bath😁!!
I have tried all day to post mean stuff on Facebook hahaha, I did some but then I deleted them LOL. It’s hard being nice dammit! And very hard not to write mean stuff!!! Which gave me the opportunity to write a sexy short story today. It tore me all to hell and I’m at work…that sucked!! No more writing dirty stuff at work haha!!
I have been in I guess lala land today. I want to get away and I’ve been dreaming up a vacation for myself or a getaway. I feel like I need to get away and clear my head and my heart. Hey I only teared up once today yay! Days not over but I’m doing good.
I’m trying to get up the nerve to take myself to the movies. If I go anywhere where there’s a bunch of people my anxiety kicks in and I get all sick at my stomach and nervous and shaky and shit. If I go out n about with somebody it’s even worse. And I’ve been doing this sober for 9 months now. Ain’t getting better, I’m just learning how to cope with it more. After I save some money for a doctor I’m going, I’m insisting on getting something to help.
And if y’all didn’t pay attention or remember, I have been working on my spare change n dollars jar for a boob job 😜. It’s not THAT much like you think. It’s less than $4000 and it’s not far from me. This may be nothing to most but it’s a big deal to me! It’s important to me! I’m not doing it for any man out there, just for myself. I need and want it.
Ok then, I’m sitting on this hard concrete floor next to my machine. And the noise and vibration is putting me to sleep Lol. Almost 8!!! Ok ttyl, have a great rest of the day!!
Love, Lori 😘